Media Missionary Focus

Starbucks, Lighting and Relationship Avoidance

As much as there are numerous things I dislike about Bangkok, Thailand, one of the things I do like is Starbucks.

Overall, I much prefer Cambodia to Thailand. Cambodia has a much more laid back feel to it than Bangkok. Bangkok clearly aspires to be a world class city, and in many ways it is, but it also has a bit of a disorganized and overcrowded overtone that leaves it feeling forced in some way. Cambodia, on the other hand, is much more laid back. And of course I speak and read Khmer, but am pretty much lost with Thai. But Bangkok does have many world-wide companies and services that are still absent in Phnom Penh. Within about a two block radius of the hotel I am writing this from I can find Burger King, McDonalds, Sizzler, Kentucky Fried Chicken, a large mall, an elevated train station, and most importantly, two Starbucks coffee shops.

We are here in Bangkok for an area wide Assemblies of God missionary retreat. So part of the plan is to relax and unwind. Lisa has here way of doing that. Usually it includes shopping (both window and real), or getting her nails done, or some such thing. I tend to have a very different system of relaxation. My idea of relaxation comes down to going to Starbucks, getting a big cup of coffee, sitting in one of their overstuffed chairs and spending a few hours reading a good technical instruction book (I’m currently reading through a really good one on professional lighting for video and film).

As I sat talking with Lisa yesterday about what we each found relaxing, I realized that as I get older I seem to be less and less of a people person. Not that I was ever a complete social life of the party type, but I seem to enjoy being alone more and more. The problem is I don’t necessarily see this as a good thing. As much as I might enjoy hiding out from everyone else and getting lost in a good cup of coffee and the details of professional lighting, I know that it is important for me to use this time to build relationships with my family and my fellow missionaries.

So what is it that I find so attractive about technical books? I think it is the concrete nature of it. It is all about A+B=C, it is hard facts, it is step one, step two, step three. Sure there is some “art” and skill involved in doing a good job at these various technical things, like lighting, but it is still pretty black and white and simple. Relationships are an entirely different animal! You have to decide what the other person is thinking and feeling. There are very few black and white things, mostly it is shades of gray. There is being polite or diplomatic. It isn’t at all easy, and it involves emotional investment and risk. There isn’t any of that in deciding where to place a key light and whether you should use a fresnel light or HMI. Hiding out in Starbucks with the lighting book, I have decided, may be more relaxing, but if that is all I do, I am taking the cowards way out and missing an opportunity to build relationships that will give me more than just lighting information.

The funny thing is, I find a similar tendency in my spiritual life with God. I’m ready to get up early, put in my Bible reading and prayer time, and move on. It’s simple. I read X number of chapters, I cover X number of topics in prayer, and I’m pretty much set. I want to reduce my relationship with God to a black and white set of formulas that leave no ambiguity or uncertainty. But the reality is my relationship with God is a RELATIONSHIP, and no real relationship is that simple. Paul said we work out our salvation with fear and trembling. Why? I think C.S. Lewis captured it well in The Chronicles of Narnia. In the first book, The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe, the children ask the the beaver if Aslan, the lion who represents Jesus in the story, is a safe lion. The beaver kind of laughs and says who ever heard of a safe lion. But they could be sure he was a good lion. Is God safe? Not exactly, but He is good. Any relationship we have with Him will be risky in some sense. So reducing it to X hours in prayer and Bible study is to avoid the relationship in favor of a set of rules and a dead religion.

So I don’t abandon my regular prayer and Bible study. It still has great benefits. But I have to make and effort to bring God into my daily situation and build a relationship on honesty, openness and time spent together. I can still have my Starbucks, but I need to make sure I take time to share it with both those around me physically, and the savior who is always with me spiritually as well.

posted by Troy In Cambodia @ 2:44 PM